5

As a traveller myself, I love visiting hostels and listening to travellers stories, however every now and then you get the occasional nutter. Just the same, you also get the arrogant travellers and the ones that feel anything touristy is ‘so cliche’ and that you’re selling out by seeing something like Machu Picchu. Here is a mini list of things that annoy me about some of the travellers I have met:

  1. Dreadlocks – we know your travelling, it doesn’t mean you have to go a year without washing your hair. It stinks and there are normally bugs living in them, keep away!
  2. Tourist trap haters – as mentioned at the start, you will meet quite a few people who stick their nose up when you tell them your itinary…travelling is about doing what you enjoy and learning new cultures, it should be tailor suited to each one, therefore judging other peoples plans makes you a douche.
  3. petty thieves – I have been fortunate not to have anything major stolen from my bags, however I do find little things disappear, such as shower gel or plug adaptors…If it doesn’t belong to you, don’t take it.
  4. The milkers – they don’t bring a laptop, however they feel they have some ownership over yours. I happily lend out my laptop to people, however when they use it for like two hours, it starts to take the biscuit.
  5. Language snobs – I admit I can’t speak any more than the basics in Spanish, however soon as I go to a restaurant, I try my best to speak broken Spanish. There is nothing that annoys me more than seeing people from England/America talk in English and then act annoyed when the staff don’t understand them!
  6. The snorers – OK, I know people don’t choose to snore, but some are louder than a brick in a washing machine.
  7. The light pushers – if people are in their hostel rooms sleeping, don’t walk in and turn the light on. Use your phone as a light and respect others in the room, otherwise I’m going to play drum n bass first thing in the morning.
  8. The food stealers…come on man, you know you didn’t buy that cheese!
  9. The judgers (irony) – if people want to go out drinking, then fair enough to them, don’t act like their sub-human because they want to have a good time. Just the same, if someone doesn’t want to hike and would rather get the bus to the destination, don’t judge them, let them be!
  10. The intimates – I am writing this while a couple are sitting on the sofa opposite me licking each others ears. Cool it yeah!
  11. The angry callers – the ones that go into the communal rooms, call someone back home and then get annoyed at other people for being too loud. The communal areas or bars in the hostel are where everyone’s gets to mingle and make new friends, don’t act like its your private bar. If you wanted a private room, what are you doing in a hostel?!
  12. The alarmers (not to be confused with llamas) – fair enough if you need your alarm to go off at the crack of dawn, but turn it off as quickly as possible, don’t leave it ringing for ages, and definitely don’t hit snooze!
  13. The vomiters – I don’t mean this in a cruel way and I know people can get sick, but if you get motion sickness, don’t go on a dunebuggy ride! None of us want to spend the entire trip holding our breaths because someone who hates fast moving cars decided to take a dune buggy ride over the desert dunes at a ridiculously fast pace and threw up all over the floor (this is from previous experience if you couldn’t guess).
  14. Bathroom hoggers – if there is one bathroom split between 14 people, please don’t take an hour long bath, some of us might need the toilet!
  15. Fridge fillers – if the hostel has a shared fridge between 50 people, don’t buy 5 bottles of milk and use up the entire door. I will perform a balancing act with my food and if it spills all over your food, you only have your self to blame.
  16. The fluffy beards – I have a stubbly beard and will always have one, but I don’t quite get why people feel the moment they go travelling, they will never shave again. I’ve seen some serious bum fluff on peoples face and it can look rather humerous, but why does every guy do this? Fair enough if you want the Gandalf (WordPress couldn’t recognise the word Gandalf and offered Uganda as a suggestion….no words) look, but accept a snigger from me.
  17. The smokers – I know this will split opinions and my knock isn’t at smokers, but at the ones that smoke all over other people and get annoyed at anti smokers. I’m not spitting on your face, don’t breath your smoke on mine.
  18. The mess haters – When I get to a hostel, I tend to unload a lot of stuff out of my bag onto my bed, but it is my bed! I have once had someone tell me off for making mess in the room…it’s my bed! It isn’t on the floor and I have paid for the bed, I can do what I want on it…wait, that sounds wrong.
  19. The ethnocentric ones – the people that feel their culture is the right way and everything else is weird. Just because it is different, it doesn’t make it wrong. If you really struggle to accept this concept, then visit countries with a psychological proximity, this way you won’t have to moan all the time.
  20. The rich wannabe’s – I never get why people stay in a hostel and complain it isn’t to the standards of a 5 star hotel, of course it isn’t, you’re paying £5 a night! That’s less than lunch in Nando’s!

Written by | tombourlet

Tom Bourlet is the creator of Spaghetti Traveller and has been addicted to travelling ever since taking a roadtrip across the USA.

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